A Prayer

Lord, help us not to be proud of our humility. Let us lose ourselves in finding the greatness in others; let us be so consumed with others' comfort that we forget to seek our own; help us so concern ourselves with the rights of even our enemies that we cease to see them as such. Let us stand so firmly for others' dignity, and kneel down so often at the feet of the least of our brethren in service, that we fail to notice when anyone steps on our toes. Forgive us for being so far from these ideals, but help us forget ourselves in striving so hard to see You.

"I tell you," says Jesus, "though he [God] will not get up and give him the bread because he is his friend, yet because of the man's boldness he will get up and give him as much as he needs" (Luke 11:8). 

Okay, let me be bold and persistent in my asking: please hear my prayer, Almighty God, and grant my son a full recovery in the coming school years, that he may function socially, spiritually, emotionally, intellectually, at high levels and learn to speak, and speak well. 

But in my boldness, I also ask: If you are willing to heal, then why do you allow such a thing as autism in the first place? 

Jesus answered, "It was neither that this man sinned, nor his parents; but it was in order that the works of God might be displayed in him" (John 9:3). 

It is hard for me to understand your will, but please help me to accept it. Not my will, but Thine.

Had a meeting with the Special Needs coordinators at the local elementary school this morning. The results of their assessment of Logan showed "severely autistic" traits. It is hard to hear this again. But at least they know now the level of his need, and they can be gearing up for his arrival, possibly next fall. They can be looking for "para's" (para-professionals, or extra helpers) with more training in ABA and they can be aware of the intensive methods and therapies that work for him. Lord, help us train him up and do right by this boy who has so much potential locked away. Help us to help him learn how to learn!

Jesus is in the neighborhood

"Jesus is in the neighborhood! Performing miracles and doing good." Today we were blessed by a little boy named Gary, 9 yrs old, who lives next door to my mom. As I pushed Logan past in the stroller, he ran along the fence, calling to his dad on the way, "Can I play with Logan?" The simple blessing of this boy reaching out to my son is beyond words.

He and Logan chased each other up and down the fort and slide; he'd try to tag Logan before he reached the top and then nudge him down the slide, then Logan would return the favor and give him the boot down, laughing all the while. I cheered them on and after Logan got his confidence up, he was nearly running up the ramp.

Then we three went out to feed the deer and look for Gary and his brother Micah's hideouts in the ravines and woods. We cleaned out litter like old beer cans and fast food trash tossed by drivers, and the whole way Logan climbed up the steep slopes, over fallen trees, and through brush and thorny bramble without hesitation. It was a great hike, and Gary kept talking to Logan during our whole visit.

When the girls came over, Gary pushed them in the swing and carried Elinor around and played so well with her that she cried when he had to leave. Gary, who had come over wearing flip-flops, told me he admired Logan's cool neon Nike shoes and that he was going to buy some like that with the Xmas money his mom would give him, adding that his parents were divorced.

During the afternoon, it also came out that Gary's B-B gun was broken, but I told him about a Daisy I have that's too small for me that he could use if his Dad approved. Thank you, Lord, for sending Gary to be our neighbor. It gave my son the chance to play like any boy among other boys. I only pray we can pass on that blessing.

The Director of Logan's clinic called Amanda and said he'd had the best week in the entire year he's been enrolled there. He is not only using ~50 words a day there, he is signing for things. Today at the playground, Logan signed that he wanted a drink several times to me. He also stayed dry for over 1.5 hours while we were out! At Mama Jean's he replied when Amanda asked what he wanted to do by making the sign for swinging, so they went straight out to the hammock. Afterward, she served him Butter Pecan from Braums and he said, "Ice...CREAM!" and pointed to each spoonful for another bite. On the walk home, we spotted baby calves in a field right next to us who huddled close to each other. Audrey asked, "Why are they hugging?" Logan repeated, "Hug!"

Mandy & I took Logan and Audrey on some adventures this Labor Day. First we dropped Elinor off with Mama Jean, and then we headed out to Natural Falls (film site of Where the Red Fern Grows), just 10 minutes from our house. 

We played on the playground, then set off on our hike on the trail that now crosses the creek and circles the small "mountain" beyond the dam. Logan fussed hard at the heat and not having stones to throw (this creek was strangely devoid of rocks) but eventually he accepted this hike for what it was and proved again that he's a natural hiker and climber. One part goes nearly vertical from the base of another creek crossing, and Logan found handholds on tree roots and rock outcroppings like they were simply a ladder going up. We enjoyed snow cones after we got back to the parking lot. 

After nap time (during which Daddy trimmed the hedges and tried cleaning the gutters), we then drove out to Flint Creek, where Logan found thousands of rocks to hurl down for that pleasing "ka-thunk" sound. We also used the inner tube to float by the falls and splash around, and all of us enjoyed twist cones before heading to Mama Jean's for baths and a tortilla soup supper. Thank God for a day of rest!

I remember a guest speaker at Harding one time, some kind of enterprising business leader, who talked about how he arranged his life to be a better Dad. He worked extra hard 4 days out of the week so he could have 3 day weekends with his family. His son was born with some kind of devastating condition, or so the doctors said, but daily he kept praying, massaging the baby's limbs and telling him reassuring words about his wondrous abilities and as the boy grew, he overcame the diagnoses. I've never forgotten that story.

More than anything, a child must know they are loved and cherished. I don't pretend that Logan's autism will magically go away, but I am sure he'll do better if he knows that he's wonderfully made. Yes, he is neurally and behaviorally atypical right now, but God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. There are more important things than being faster, better, stronger, more graceful, or more clever (though we should all do our personal bests) and daily I'm reminded of that. There's a place and a purpose for everyone under heaven, and Logan was put here to bring glory to God. I know our Lord delights in him, and I do too!